PERFUME OILS
2AM Diner Coffee
The scent of a too-big mug of coffee at your favorite all-night diner after the clubs let out: a slow ribbon of clove smoke, the warm fry-oil haze that clings to everything, and a fleeting gust of maple syrup drifting through the booths.
A Date With Krampus
This one’s a holiday scent for all the Archive of Our Own regulars, proud teratophiliacs, and slashfic aficionados: those brave, unblushing souls who know exactly what tags they’re filtering for and aren’t afraid of a little (or a lot of) morally-ambiguous monster romance. A filthy-sweet gourmand gone feral: scorched caramel and dark cocoa nibs tangled with warm, skin-slick musk, a crack of black leather, a swirl of brandy, and the faint metallic scrape of chains dragged across a bedroom floor.
Amber Incense and Honeycakes
An offering made in the depths of the year’s darkness to honor the Solstice sun.
Barraquito
Espresso poured over lush condensed milk and a bright thread of lemon, sweetened with Licor 43 and finished with a dusting of warm cinnamon.
The Bear Prince
Shaggy fur, snow-flecked and rose-touched.
Black Coffee and Apple Pie
The inky bite of black coffee rising in gusts of steam, softened by the warm-gold glow of buttered crust and sugared apples.
Black Julbocken Alchemy Lab
Our winter mascot! A musky, snow-touched, forest-deep Yuletide blend: shaggy black wool and a slushy tangle of juniper, mistletoe, winter sage, spikenard, white moss, and terebinth.
Blackberry Cream Cheese Sufganiyot
Tangy cream cheese folded through warm bakery dough, still puffed from the fryer, and thick, dark wild blackberry jam.
Bread Pudding for an Unfortunate Widow
A whiff of seasonal dread, candied and cursed; the perfect gourmand perfume for holiday melancholics. A dense, boozy thud of brandied plum, candied citrus peel, dried cherries, sherry, blackened clove and nutmeg, ambered dust, moth-eaten burgundy velvet curtains, and a tiny plume of smoke from recently-spent matchsticks.
Brown Sugar Vanilla Latte
After thirty years of reluctantly drinking coffee, Ted has become a bean aficionado thanks to a local shop called the Head Nut. Recently, we bought French vanilla and bourbon chocolate beans from them and ever since that day, Ted has been hooked. Of course, Ted’s morning coffee is the breakfast beverage equivalent to a cozy hug: a slow-simmered swirl of brown sugar melting into steamed milk, wrapped around the soothing, sweet warmth of vanilla-infused espresso.
Bulgarian Rose and Coffee Beans
Voluptuous Bulgarian rose unfurls like crimson silk, met by the dark, resinous warmth of freshly cracked coffee beans.
But Men Loved Darkness Rather Than Light 2025
The world will love its darkness: cistus labdanum, ginger, East Indian patchouli, pimento berry, oakmoss, saffron, smoky vanilla, sage, myrrh, and bitter clove.
Cafe con Miel
Soothing, warm and quietly radiant: espresso kissed with honey, swirled into warm steamed milk, and crowned with a dusting of cinnamon.
Chanukkiyah 2025
Olive oil, olive blossom, beeswax, glowing amber, sweet sufganiyot, pomegranate, and fig.
Chicory Coffee and Beignets
The perfume of French Quarter mornings: rich chicory coffee, earthy and bittersweet, drifting through the powdered-sugar clouds of warm beignets dusted to luminosity.
Christmas Lustre
May Christmas shed lustre around you.
Amber-illuminated roasted chestnut, cardamom, caramel, and allspice.
Christmasween
The scent of ghost stories told beside a crackling fireplace, with garlands of evergreen hanging beside October’s carved pumpkins. Hearthlight and jack o’lanterns cast shadows on cobwebbed corners. Candied orange peel, mulled cider, smoked myrrh twirling through a cranberry garland, balsam resin and amber-drizzled pumpkin, smoldering hearthwood, and the soft honeyed glow of dripping beeswax.
Coffee Beans, Caramel, and Golden Amber
Freshly roasted coffee beans releasing their dark, velvety warmth amongst ribbons of molten caramel and a haze of deliciously radiant golden amber.
Coffee Ice Cream Float
My Lolo used to make these every Sunday. A swirl of nostalgia: cold, creamy coffee ice cream melting into a fizz of root beer, turning effervescent bubbles into caramelized satin.
The Crumpet-Fanlight Expedition
A bitterly cold, bone-white chypre; austere polar musk, vegan ambergris, and white tea combine to make a genteel, frigid perfume as bright and sharp as the first crack of glacial ice.
Dismembered Noggin Bouquet
Not exactly my definition of a happy Christmas, but to each their own. Wild pansies, white honey, and frothy cream.
Diwali
Lotus root, mogra, mango, tamarind, cardamom, clove, almond milk, cashew, rice flower, coconut, supari, raisins, and incense crafted from aloeswood, red sandalwood, cedar, and spikenard.
Dulce de Leche Sufganiyot
A molten heart of slow-cooked milk caramel swirled with vanilla bean and a faint whisper of toasted coconut.
Dumb Cake 2025
This is the scent of an awkward encounter with a Yule-evoked doppelgänger mate: spectral cologne, blurry herbs, fireplace ash, and a dusting of crumbs.
Edward Bear
Honey-slathered buttered toast, glittering amber beams of sunlight, warm milk, cotton stuffing, and cuddly roasted vanilla.
Eel King
7-year aged patchouli, candied dates, and dried red currant.
The Erl-King’s Pale Daughter
Moonlit mist clinging to skin the color of ghost lilies, pearlescent and cold. A spectral musk possessing the sheen of river water at night.
Eviscerated with a No. 7 Crochet Hook
A bloodless scent stitched together like delicate antique lace, with a hint of powdered violet, plum brandy, and gleaming aldehydes.
Faithfully Yours, Charles Dickens
48, Rue de Courcelles.
Eighteenth January 1847
My Dear Mrs. F.
I send you, on the other side, the tremendous document which will make you for ninety years (I hope) a beautiful Punchmaker in more senses as one.
I shall be delighted to dine with you on Thursday. Mr Foster says amen. Commend me to your Lord, and believe me (with respectful compliments to Lord Chesterfield) always Mrs. F.
Faithfully yours, Charles Dickens.
To make three pints of Punch
Peel into a very strong common basin (which may be broken, in case of accident, without damage to the owner’s peace or pocket) the rinds of three lemons, cut very thin, and with as little as possible of the white coating between the peel and the fruit, attached. Add a double-handfull of lump sugar (good measure), a pint of good old rum, and a large wine-glass full of brandy – if it not be a large claret glass, say two. Set this on fire, by filling a warm silver spoon with the spirit, lighting the contents at a wax taper, and pouring them gently in. Let it burn three or four minutes at least, stirring it from time to time. Then extinguish it by covering the flame. Then squeeze in the juice of the three lemons, and add a quart of boiling water. Stir the whole well, cover it up for five minutes, and stir again.
At this crisis (having skimmed off the lemon pips with a spoon) you may taste. If not sweet enough, add sugar to your liking, but observe that it will be a little sweeter presently. Pour the whole into a jug, tie a leather or coarse cloth over the top, so as to exclude the air completely, and stand it in a hot oven ten minutes, or on a hot stove one quarter of an hour. Keep it until it comes to table in a warm place near the fire, but not too hot. If it be intended to stand three or four hours, take half the lemon-peel out, or it will acquire a bitter taste.
The same punch allowed to cool by degrees, and then iced, is delicious. It requires less sugar when made for this purpose. If you wish to produce it bright, strain it into bottles through silk.
These proportions and directions will, of course, apply to any quantity.
Festive Rat Crackers
A handful of dates and black figs plopped into a frosted glass frothing with cranberry champagne.
First Noel, First Base
Hot, sultry beeswax and blushing pink apple.
The Flame of the Bear
An incense for Solstice rites: fir resin, bayberry, myrrh, mistletoe, and oak bark.
Gingerbread & Leather
Ho ho ho: black leather, gingerbread, clove, and tobacco.
Gingerbread Glory Hole
An aromatic panel of gingerbread conveniently drilled at hip-height, smutted up with patchouli and boozy brown musk.
Gingerbread Sin
Gingerbread with amber, sandalwood, black patchouli and cinnamon.
Gingerbread Snek 2025
Gingerbread thickened with molasses and patchouli, spiced with Snake oil, and frosted with sugared vanilla bean.
Gloomily, Gloomily
Every solid friend group has at least one goth kid representing. Soft grey musk, pink thistle, lavender ash, tea leaves, pale iris, grey lilac, and rain-soaked moss. THE DONKEY’S TAIL Doubles as a bell-pull: a beribboned strip of French lavender, bourbon vanilla, silver thistle, grey musk, pink silk, and well-loved grey cotton.
Greensleeves
A sorrowful 16th-century love ballad reimagined as a yuletide hymn: heavy bolts of oakmoss-colored velvet, a heart of gold weeping sticky tears of balsam.
Hand-Knitted Witch Gloves 2025
A 2023 Halloween concoction which maybe should’ve been a Yule all along! Wooly and witchy, fuzzy and scuzzy, long green fingers tipped with ruby-red nails: raw wool, sweet oakmoss, and cranberry brandy.
Hanukkaween
A festival of frights. A jolly, hulking golem dressed in a gloriously tacky sweater: honey-dipped amber and pocket-warmed gelt, a basket of pumpkin rugelach, a smushed sufganiyah, and a touch of latke grease.
He Forgot To Be Frightened Any More
Pink clover and wild strawberries, red bean paste, pink vanilla, sweet acorns, apple blossom, caramelized almond, and a shy puff of sugar.
His Grasp Is So Cold
The spell breaks like a sudden crack in an ice-bound lake. Opoponax incense and black oud plunging into a heart-stopping shiver of ambergris accord and eucalyptus leaf.
The Huntsman
Mercy interrupting violence: well-worn leather shadowed by pine boughs, moss-slick bark, bloodroot and steel, and a tremble of wild apple.
If Bears Were Bees, If Bees Were Bears
The bees were still buzzing as suspiciously as ever. A golden gourmand for a philosopher. Wild clover honey buzzing with mead fizz, a gust of woodsmoke, and a dusting of ambered pollen.
In Doubt and In Dread
The death of innocence, a dirge for joy: black currant, labdanum tar, and myrrh.
Indigestion
A sticky brown sphere of black treacle, dried fruits, and brandy with a double honk of marshmallow fluff and buttercream.
The Inexorable Finger 2025
Black patchouli, obsidian, and oudh.
It Was Wild But the Wild Blast As It Sung Thro’ the Trees
A desperate attempt at comfort and assurances of safety. Honeyed oats, toasted clove, hazelnuts, hay, and skin-warmed wool.
Jacob’s Ladder 2025
The meeting of Heaven and Earth: golden amber, galbanum, benzoin, ambrette, rockrose, costus and tonka.
Julween
A long, chilled night where tomtenisse cavort in the deep forests with the spectral revenants of autumn. Lingonberry jam, clove bud, frankincense smoke, frost-laden skeletal branches, and steaming bowls of tomtegröt.
Justin
Candy cane wrappers, eyeliner smudges, and an oversized black licorice hoodie.
Krampus 2025
Be good, or Krampus will toss you in a river! Sinister red musk, black leather, dusty rags, and wooden switches.
Lavender Carrot Cake
Nothing beats that classic fluffy, bouncy texture, rendered eternally moist thanks to shreds of fresh carrot, delicately spiced and slathered in lavender cream cheese icing – including the obligatory carrot on top, piped in purple frosting
Lavender Honey Wine
A goblet of pale liquid gold infused with an almost iridescent shimmer of lavender essence.
Lavender Marshmallow Sundae
A rapidly melting tower of vanilla ice cream thoroughly glooped with marshmallow sauce and amethyst syrup, speared with shards of waffle cone.
Lavender Rosemary Seed Bread
An aromatic crusty loaf covered in pre-bake slashes to create a floral pattern on top, flecked with flax, sesame, pumpkin seeds.
Lavender Semlor
A row of plump, cardamom-spiced sweet buns overflowing with pooflets of lavender cream and almond paste.
Lavender Ube Mochi Donut
A chewy delight made from a blend of rice flour and purple yam, fried in lavender-infused oil and dusted with granulated sugar.
LE TITS NOW
A festive and urgently mammalian response to inclement weather: a pair of blushing musks daubed with French lavender, flecks of fresh snow, and trickles of chilled champagne.
Let Them Eat Cake
Buttercream-frosted angel food cake and a smear of strawberry lip gloss.
Lick it With Consent 2025
A sugar-crusted vanilla peppermint stick!
Lines Written by a Bear of Very Little Brain
Hot, sunny cardamom amber and milky musk, honeyed rice and snowy slush.
Lured With Cinnamon Balls
A fatal temptation: vanilla bean paste, allspice, ground almond accord, cinnamon sugar, golden caster sugar, and a dusting of icing sugar.
Mabel
Black lipstick and frozen cherry slush.
Many a Fair Toy, Many a Fine Flower
The promise of dew-bright meadows and sugar-spun toys, gleaming and hollow: apple peel, wild violet, meadowsweet, and candied blood-red fruits.
Maraschino Babydoll
Liqueur-soaked twin cherries reeling from a double pony-kick of pink pepper and white ginger.
Midnight Mass
This perfume is a traditional Roman Catholic sacramental incense, most often used during a Solemn Mass. Traditionally, five tears of this incense, each encased individually in wax that has been fashioned into the shape of a nail, are inserted into the paschal candle. This, of course, represents the Five Wounds of Our Risen Savior. Symbolically, the burning of the incense signifies spiritual fervor, the fragrance itself inspires virtue, and the rising smoke carries our prayers to God.
Nuts Cracker
His appetite is insatiable! Crumbs of gnawed marzipan and toasted hazelnuts tumbling through a thicket of patchouli and gunpowder and bouncing off of a throbbing cherrywood ramrod.
Old Books and a Flat White
Dust-soft vellum, cracked leather, and yellowed pages exhaling their ghost of vanillin, a triple shot of espresso, and a deft swirl of warm, velvety microfoam.
One Has To Be Careful
The Hundred Acre Wood’s resident Virgo (affectionate). The scent of neat rows and polite refusals: toasted oats and clover honey, crushed lemon verbena, wild carrot leaf, and white tea poured with exacting care. A dab of condensed milk on a clean spoon, a faint rustle of vetiver, and a courteous cough to suggest that your visit has gone on quite long enough.
Peacock Queen 2025
In dramatic contrast to the soft innocence of Snow White and the dew-kissed freshness of her sister, Rose Red, this is a blood red, voluptuous rose, velvet-petaled, at the height of bloom. Haughty and imperious, vain, yet incomparably lovely to the eye, but thick with thorns of jealousy, pride and hatred.
Pine Cone Sack Attack
Pine sap and amber ashes.
Playdate With Krampus
A playdate with monsters: crimson musk stirred into molten sugar, ruby pomegranate syrup, tart cherries, a dusting of clove-spun candyfloss, and a drizzle of warm vanilla resin.
The Poinsettia Gown 2025
A perfume simply inspired by a vintage Christmas postcard. Rose cream, jasmine cream, mallow, vanilla foam, and sweet amber.
Pomegranate and Burning Leaves
Pomegranate and Pistachio Cream
Pomegranate and Red Rose
Pomegranate and Scarlet Chypre
Pomegranate and Smoked Cacao
Pomegranate Candy Canes
Pomegranate Loukoumi and Champagne
Pumpkin Spice Eggnog Latte
Pumpkin custard swirled with thick eggnog, dark roast coffee, grated nutmeg, soft cinnamon, and a drizzle of brown-sugar syrup.
Retch
Unkempt oudh and hot chocolate spiked with booze from a hidden flask.
Rose Red 2025
The perfected winter rose, dew covered and freshly cut.
Santa Doesn’t Need Your Help 2025
A calming, affirming fragrance to help motivate Santa through the daunting tasks which await him year after year: sugar plum lavender marshmallows.
Shitfaced Robins
Red winter berries crushed under tiny claws, fermented wild cherry and mulled brandy spilling into russet feathers.
Skogtroll 2025
Our gruesome blend of ghastly greens and blacks, now streaked with blue-white: frozen and snow-packed vetiver, pine pitch, troll musk, elemi, camphor, black basil, eucalyptus blossom, clove smoke, and scorched cumin
Smithereena
Black leather flecked with remnants of a gloopy food court cinnamon bun.
Snake Oil and Candied Pomegranate
Snakes in the Coffee Beans
The dark, roasted bite of freshly crushed coffee beans folded into the sinuous heat of Snake Oil’s infamous bestseller. Bitter espresso grounds smoldering under a curled-up hiss of sugared patchouli, spiced amber, and velvety vanilla.
Snow White 2025
A chilly, bright perfume: flurries of virgin snow, crisp winter wind and the faintest breath of night-blooming flowers.
Snowman Beatdown
A jolly Christmas for some. For others? Not so much. Frosted sage, icy green and menacing.
So Devilish Hard
Sugared-crusted marshmallows and cinnamon candies.
Strawberry Cotton Candy Sufganiyot
Strawberry preserves twisting through clouds of pink cotton candy and marshmallow fluff.
With Care and With Joy
An ethereal lure crafted with milk and honey.
Woodland Gang Initiation
Winter oak, hazelnuts, and butterscotch rum.
The Woodland So Wild
The pale sugared blossoms of innocence wrapped tightly in sleet-soaked arms. Vanilla bourbon, cream peony, and white carnation enveloped in a warm, protective fortress of tonka, white cedar, orris root, red amber, and leather.
POTIONS
Butter Rum Cookie Atmosphere Spray
Rum-soaked butter cookies, crusted with sugar, soaked in almond and garnished with orange rind.
Discarded Popcorn Garland Atmosphere Spray
Salty and smushed.
Lavender Apron Atmosphere Spray
A sturdy but soft lavender cotton twill, lightly flour- and sugar-dusted, with deep pockets full of kitchen mysteries.
Midnight Mass Atmosphere Spray
This scent is a traditional Roman Catholic sacramental incense, most often used during a Solemn Mass. Traditionally, five tears of this incense, each encased individually in wax that has been fashioned into the shape of a nail, are inserted into the paschal candle. This, of course, represents the Five Wounds of Our Risen Savior. Symbolically, the burning of the incense signifies spiritual fervor, the fragrance itself inspires virtue, and the rising smoke carries our prayers to God.
Pomegranate and Black Pine Room Spray
Pomegranate Popcorn Room Spray
Red Amber and Pomegranate Room Spray
Santa Doesn’t Need Your Help 2025 Atmosphere Spray
A calming, affirming fragrance to help motivate Santa through the daunting tasks which await him year after year: sugar plum lavender marshmallows.
Snow White 2025 Atmosphere Spray
A chilly, bright scent: flurries of virgin snow, crisp winter wind and the faintest breath of night-blooming flowers.
Bananas Foster Hair Gloss
Caramel-soaked banana slices sizzling in butter and brown sugar, flamed with dark rum, and poured over warm vanilla ice cream.
Buttered Beere Hair Gloss
Take three pintes of Beere, put fiue yolkes of Egges to it, straine them together, and set it in a pewter pot to the fyre, and put to it halfe a pound of Sugar, one penniworth of Nutmegs beaten, one penniworth of Cloues beaten, and a halfepenniworth of Ginger beaten, and when it is all in, take another pewter pot and brewe them together, and set it to the fire againe, and when it is readie to boyle, take it from the fire, and put a dish of sweet butter into it, and brewe them together out of one pot into an other.
– The Good Huswifes Handmaide for the Kitchin, 1594
Frankincense Smoke Hair Gloss
A frost-edged nave of stone, where stained glass glimmers with the light from prayer-lofted votives. Spirals of incense drift through the chill winter air, mingling with the solemn drip of beeswax from altar candles. Cedar pews gleam under centuries of prayer, and the air hums with hushed devotion.
Lavender Kitchen Mouse Hair Gloss
Lavender cotton candy fur and vanilla popcorn balls, sent skittering out of the kitchen with a good-natured wave of our polished wood rolling pin.
The Poinsettia Gown Hair Gloss
A fragrance simply inspired by a vintage Christmas postcard. Rose cream, jasmine cream, mallow, vanilla foam, and sweet amber.
Pomegranate and Plum Tea Hair Gloss
And a drop of wildflower honey
Pomegranate Molasses Hair Gloss
Pomegranate Slush Hair Gloss
A snowy, chilled pomegranate slurry.
Red Rose Hair Gloss
We have resurrected Black Phoenix Trading Post’s sensual 2009 masterpiece. Red rose buds, with amber, clove, tonka, Indian musk, fir, and tobacco.
Sugar Cookie Hair Gloss
A BPAL favorite since 2005, affectionately nicknamed ‘The Devil’s Bake Sale.’
Peacock Queen Lotion
In dramatic contrast to the soft innocence of Snow White and the dew-kissed freshness of her sister, Rose Red, this is a blood red, voluptuous rose, velvet-petaled, at the height of bloom. Haughty and imperious, vain, yet incomparably lovely to the eye, but thick with thorns of jealousy, pride and hatred.
Pomegranate and Black Fig Lotion
Snow White Lotion
A chilly, bright scent: flurries of virgin snow, crisp winter wind and the faintest breath of night-blooming flowers.
Sugar Cookie Lotion
A BPAL favorite since 2005, affectionately nicknamed ‘The Devil’s Bake Sale.’
Yellow Snowballs Lotion
Slushy white mint, vanilla cream, lemon drops, grapefruit, and yuzu!
Aurum Beard Oil
Molten amber, gilded tobacco flower, and Mysore sandalwood.
Libanotos Beard Oil
Frankincense, terebinth, and Italian bergamot.
Mureera Beard Oil
Kataf myrrh, smoked sandalwood, and vanilla bean.
Pomegranate and Cathedral Incense Beard Oil
